How to attract a man

If you don't know how to attract a man this page will cover some important aspects of the psychology you will need and the actions you will need to take in the quest to attract men.

To acquire the knowledge is not difficult but like all things, knowing and doing are not the same. I am going to be harsh here because it is not compassionate of me to beat around the bush on this issue. Waiting for Prince Charming to come and knock on your door is never going to happen!!!

It is true that Prince Charming did scour the countryside looking for Cinderella but only after she got off her butt and put some effort into getting to the Ball in the first place. No Ball, no meeting Prince Charming, no lost slipper, no search for the foot that fit the slipper, no happy ever after. She knew how to attract a man and it wasn't by staying home keeping an immaculate house.

You know what I am saying is true but you think that miraculously Mr Right will turn up and sweep you off your feet just because you are a wonderful person. He doesn't know that you are wonderful unless he gets to meet you and he will NEVER get to meet you unless you get out there.

Now, Cinderella did have a little help from her fairy godmother (that's me) so hopefully if you put into practice what I say you will soon not be alone and leading a much happier life and I want that for you. I really want you to learn how to attract a man and by that I mean a 'good' man.

I am happily married now but I put a lot of work into it before I met my wife. That work was well worth it because my wife is the best. However, it wasn't easy and was often frustrating, but I persisted and found a great woman. She was working at it from the other end, putting herself out there. It wasn't easy for her either. She dated over 100 men before she met me.

One of my sergeants in Special Forces used to say 'If what we did was easy, everyone would do it' and that goes for learning how to attract a man as well. Judging from the number of women who love to quote the old myth 'All the good men are taken' I would say that too many women are choosing the easy path and doing nothing or doing it all wrong.

Meeting Mr or Mrs Right is never easy but it has got to be better than ending up as the crazy old woman with lots of cats who lives on her own and smells of pee :-)That woman will never learn how to attract a man.

When I was teaching women this information I found that the biggest stumbling block for them in learning how to attract a man was how women thought the world SHOULD be.

They thought that men HAD to approach them, because that was what men were SUPPOSED to do. I heard this time and time again. My favourite line from women was 'I wouldn't have anything to do with any man who didn't have the guts to come and talk to me'. Well, Duh!!! Of course you wouldn't because they would never approach you.

Do you know how much guts it takes to cold approach women?. HEAPS!!. Do you also know how humiliating it is to be fobbed off? HEAPS!! Do you also know how impressed we men are if women approach us? HEAPS!!! Even if I am not attracted to them I am always nice to them and have had some great conversations with women. If nothing else we have had a nice time communicating. So, here is some wood so you can build a bridge and get over yourself because you are your worst enemy in learning how to attract a man.

I am being blunt because you are not getting any younger and I want you to have a better life.

If what I just said has offended you then you are not ready for the information on these pages. You may need to sit at home for another year on your own, but you'll be welcome when you do come back.

Now, it is time to get pro-active.

Putting yourself out there is only part of the solution. To get the complete package have a look at my body orientated how to attract men page.

You have to realise that men value looks first and personality second so look at the body page when you get a chance but understand that personality can make up for a lot even if it is in second place.

Early research showed that personality made no difference to dating outcomes. If a female was attractive that was enough for a man to want to date them. Women were a bit more lenient and were willing to allow a male's personality to make up for a lack of good looks.

Don't go thinking that you are therefore much nicer people than us men. The personality is an indicator of the potential for status and that is why women value it. For men, 'beauty' is an indicator of health and fertility and that is why we value it (see my beauty secret page to understand this better).

However, recent research has demonstrated that men's view of beauty can be widened if you have a good personality. Combine that personality with a half-way decent body and you are on your way.

Now I can't do anything about your personality. Only you can improve it if it needs improving but the most important thing in learning how to attract a man is to learn how to MEET men. Don't fall for the myths that all the good men are married or gay. There are plenty of men in the world who are available and will be great for you.

Forget about THE ONE and start thinking about THE MANY. You pass them every day in shops, cafes, at work, on the bus, in the park, and on trains, planes and ferries and now you can also easily find them on the internet as well.

All you have to do is start with a smile. That is all. They will smile back unless there is something wrong with them or you do a wacky smile that makes you look like a psycho. I used to teach 'how to attract a man' to women as a hobby of mine just because I saw so many who needed help. I would normally do it in the context of a bar, bistro or nightclub and some would ask me if I was a date doctor.

It all came out of my own journey of learning to interact with and attract women. Life is often happier with a partner, if you choose the right one. Was it easy for me? No. I tend towards the shy side, although I have mostly overcome it, so approaching women was very stressful.

However, I did it anyway and at one stage approached 459 women in a nine month period in coffee shops, on the street, supermarkets etc, etc. That is 91 women each month, around 23 a week or 3 or 4 each day. I started with a smile, moved to hello, then a few words of conversation, then a fun interaction chatting for a few minutes.

Eventually I could get a phone number within a few minutes and be dating them the next week. Before you start to think I am Brad Pitt...I have very average looks. So if I can do it, considering that most women are wary of strange men talking to them, then how much more successful could you be, when you consider that men would LOVE women to talk to them, and no, they won't think you are easy, just friendly.

But I have retired from doing this as I don't go to clubs or pubs anymore since I met my wife (I never liked them anyway). How does that help you?

Well, luckily, a few years ago I was lucky enough to meet via the internet, a guy called David Wygant and I interviewed him for some research I was doing on human attraction. David is a really nice guy and was very helpful. David is also the guy that Will Smith's character in 'HITCH' is based on.

Anyway, since those days David has risen to the heights as THE foremost relationship/dating coach in the U.S.A. He is an expert at teaching a woman how to attract a man. So rather than me teach you (since I only ever did it as a hobby), I have asked David, who does this professionally, to teach you instead.

He has lots of free info on his website and he wrote a great book called "Always Talk To Strangers", which I used as a handbook when I was teaching women how to meet men and I recommend it.

You can get plenty of info from David's website to get you started and you can access it here. You can sit at home with some ice cream, chocolate and donuts and whine about 'all the good men are taken' or...you can harden up Princess and get out there.

Life is more fun with good men in it. Good luck.

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